There Is a Beauty Within You - “I am” Meditation Series
by
Bob Lingvall
SMASHWORDS EDITION
* * * * *
PUBLISHED BY:
Bob Lingvall on Smashwords
There Is a Beauty Within You - “I am” Meditation Series
Copyright © 2010 by Robert Lingvall
All rights reserved. Without limiting the rights under copyright reserved above, no part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in or introduced into a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form, or by any means (electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise) without the prior written permission of both the copyright owner and the above publisher of this book.
Smashwords Edition License Notes
This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each person you share it with. If you're reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then you should return to Smashwords.com and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the author's work.
* * * * *
Table of Contents
Poem: Your Original Face, Your Open Heart
On Doing the Mediations Safely and Effectively
“I am” Meditation 1: Using the Moment as a Mirror
“I am” Meditation 2: Watching From Behind Your Eyes
“I am” Meditation 3: Where Is This Self of Soap Opera and Love Song?
“I am” Meditation 4: Where Neuroscience and Mystical Intuition Converge
“I am” Meditation 5: How Is It That Matter Can Be Self Aware?
“I am” Meditation 6: Finding Our Self in Emptiness and Silence
“I am” Meditation 7: Resting In the Compassionate Love and Bliss of Being
“I am” Meditation 8: A Key to the Mystic’s Logic
Poem: Why Be Less Than You Are
* * * * *
Introduction
These meditations and reflections are a very practical response to the call to know yourself directly by looking inwardly and asking the question, “Who am I?” The meditations are simple to do and can be practiced by anyone.
Their purpose is the uncovering of your perfection and beauty. Life is not about becoming a more loving person, but coming to know and express the love you already are. It is not a matter of becoming a more compassionate person, but living a life reflective of the fact you are compassion. Bliss doesn’t just reside within you, it is you.
How is this possible? The deeper truth is when we are reduced to our essence we are simply a point of awareness. When we are conscious of having a human body and we are using the senses of the human body, it is our self as a point of awareness that is seeing with human eyes, hearing with human ears.
When we return to our essence of being a point of awareness we perceive directly all that is. This direct perception finds a universe not composed of objects. It is not a universe of space and time, but a universe of personal, intimate, blissful, compassionate love. It is this very love we search for in our world of people, places, and things. We know this love. Our memory of it is not conscious, but its pull is strong in each of us, manifesting in various ways such as loneliness or restlessness, as well as loyalty and affection. Finding this love once again draws us on the very deepest level. It is what we hope to find in family and friend, God and lover. Each voice, song, or touch is measured by this ancient longing
The practice of these meditations will prepare us once again for the direct realization of this love. Since we lost our true selves in space and time as a self composed of body and mind, then our exercises need to get to the root of these. The root of time is the present moment. The root of the self is the awareness reflected in the experience of “I am.” This series of meditations will support the realization of our original beauty by directing our attention to these roots - the lived experience of being awareness in the present moment - “I am.”
* * * * *
Your Original Face, Your Open Heart
When do the stones of the pyramid become sacred,
Or your lips the very lips of God?
When does silence become wisdom,
Or waiting become prayer?
Mix darkness with silence,
Surrender with desire.
Then return to the moment,
Just before awareness gives birth to thought.
There, find yourself waiting,
Your original face, your open heart.
* * * * *
On Doing the Meditations Safely and Effectively
When we do the meditations in this book we will shift our focus from the content of what we are sensing to our self as the silent awareness engaged in the act of sensing. We will take the stance of the witness in each meditation. Since we are turning our attention inward be sure to do these meditations only when it is possible to do them safely. Never do these meditations while driving or performing any task demanding attention, focus, or a response on your part of any sort. Only do these meditations when you can give them your full and complete attention.
Spend time with these meditations. Be sure to stop reading and give yourself a chance to try to do each meditation step. For example, if you are asked to visualize something, then stop reading for a moment, close your eyes, and try to visualize it. It is in the doing of the exercises that growth and change occur.
Just like any physical exercise demands repetition if you are to achieve results, it is no different with these “I am” meditations. Also, just as physical exercise programs work best when there is variety, enjoyment, and companionship, do the same here. Vary which meditations you use, have fun with them, and if possible find at least one other person to do these meditations with you.
For all the meditations, stay relaxed, breathing in and out easily and smoothly. Take a break after each one and then try again when you feel ready.
* * * * *
“I am” Meditation 1: Using The Moment as a Mirror
Reflection:
We can use the present moment as a mirror to see who we really are. It is a snapshot of our self caught in the act of living. By observing our self in the act of perception we can examine who we actually are in this very moment of life using the moment as a mirror. What is happening? Who is experiencing it? By taking this witness stance and consciously observing the present moment of sensory experience we can catch of glimpse of who we are. It gives us a moment of life we can analyze. Our analysis focuses on the one doing the sensing.
Meditation:
Let’s begin to find out who we are by focusing our attention on our self in the very act of being in the present moment. Go to a place where you can see objects that are emotionally neutral for you. We do not want anything that is emotionally charged or especially engaging. For example, looking at a chair is most likely emotionally neutral, whereas looking at a wall of family photos is emotionally more engaging.
Look around you and find an object to look at for a few seconds. Did the act of seeing make any sound? Stay with this step for a few moments. When you are ready shift your awareness to yourself in the act of looking. Be aware of yourself as the one looking. Again, listen for any sound caused by looking. Silence. The act of seeing is a silent process.
Let’s play with this a little more. Open and close your eyes a few times. Each time close them for a few seconds, just enough time to be aware of the fact that you are not seeing the world in front of you anymore. Then open your eyes and begin seeing the world again. While you do this listen for any sound associated with the starting and the stopping of the seeing process. Did you notice any noise as each act of looking begins and ends? None at all. Everything about looking is a perfectly silent process.
Let’s try one more simple exercise. Slowly scan the view before you. Watch the scene changing. Perhaps there is even some movement in your field of vision - a bird flying, a car driving by. Now keep your attention also on yourself engaged in the act of scanning the world around you. Observe yourself as consciousness engaged in the act of seeing.
Inquiry:
What are you like? Can you get a sense of the stillness and silence you are? Begin to feel the simplicity of yourself. There is so much to hold your interest in your field of vision as you look out at the world around you, but what of you? What is your experience of yourself as you do the seeing? Can you begin to know and experience yourself as a still and simple silent point of awareness?
* * * * *
“I am” Meditation 2: `Watching From Behind Your Eyes
Reflection:
If awareness is a still, silent process and such a fundamental aspect of our self then why do we often think of ourselves as anything but stillness and silence? Is it because we identify our self with our mind and focus our attention on the stream of thoughts it produces? Is this why many of us see ourselves as someone who can't be quiet even for a moment? Instead, if we place our attention on our awareness and identify with it then we quickly come to know ourselves as stillness and silence.
Let’s continue to discover who we are in the present moment by focusing our attention on ourselves as awareness engaged in the act of seeing using our eyes. Who and where is this “I” we reference so easily in our everyday speech and thoughts? Can we find ourselves within our bodies springing out from a point of awareness?
Meditation:
Once again look around you and find an object to look at for a few seconds. Now shift your awareness to your eyes. Imagine them for a moment – their color, their shape. Next, leave your imagination and return to looking with your eyes. Place your attention on yourself actually doing the looking. Notice you are behind your eyes looking out at the world around you.
As the witnessing presence, observe yourself being this point of awareness looking out at the world. Allow your eyes to move from one object to another, while you also focus on the one looking, making no sound, watching from behind your eyes. Continue to keep your focus and attention on yourself as the awareness doing the seeing.
Stay with the seeing process for a while, keeping your attention on yourself as you are doing the seeing. Notice the stillness and silence of the process and the simplicity of yourself as the one seeing. That is you – silent, still awareness.
This can be tricky since it is not something we ordinarily do. Most likely it is a new experience so give yourself time to get comfortable with it.
Inquiry:
What can you say about yourself, the one you experienced looking out at the world from behind your eyes? What are you actually like? Can you begin to know yourself as still, silent awareness? How would you now describe yourself? Is your self concept changing at all?
* * * * *
“I am” Meditation 3: Where is This Self of Soap Opera and Love Song?
Reflection:
Where is this self that demands so much time and attention, fixing and cajoling, encouraging and pampering? Where is this self of tragedy and drama, soap opera and love song? Is it only a phantom – merely a stream of thoughts and sense impressions triggering memories and habits, hopes and fears? We want to find out because, real or not, we serve it with our time and attention.
And so we return to the purpose and strategy of our meditations - reduce the attachment to the idea of our self we refer to when we say “I” and instead turn our attention toward our self as the conscious perceiver, witnessing our self as a point of awareness.
With the use of our imagination we will turn our attention to the inside of our head and our brain and then to the perceiver inside our head. We want to find the one we refer to when we say “I” and see who it really is.
Meditation:
As we did in the previous meditation become conscious of the location of yourself behind your eyes looking out at the world around you. Next, imagine yourself inside your head looking out through your eyes.
Stay focused on being inside your head, behind your eyes. Now instead of looking out through your eyes, shift your focus and imagine looking at the back of your eyeballs. See the light streaming in from the outside. Stay here a moment looking from the inside of your head at the back of your eyeballs. Now visualize turning your attention to the inside surface of your head. See the inner surface of your skull. Notice the ridges in the bone. See the curve of the skull from the inside. Notice how the light streams in through your eye sockets, filling the inside of your head with light.
Now focus on your brain. See how it fills the inside of your head. Imagine seeing the gray folds and grooves on the outer surface of your brain. Next see this surface covered in a clear cerebral fluid filling the area between the surface of your brain and the inside of your skull.
Finally turn you attention to yourself as a point of silent awareness in the middle of your head. Reside here as the perceiver, a point of silent awareness looking out through your eyes, listening with your ears, using a brain and body to sense and navigate the world around you. Be here as long as you are comfortable.
When you find yourself losing this focus, take a few relaxing breathes and then once again get a sense of yourself as a point of silent awareness in the center of your head.
Inquiry:
Now let me pose some questions to you about yourself in the center of your head. There was awareness, but what else did you find? Was it only the grayfolds and grooves of the brain bathed in clear, water-like cerebral fluid?
Let’s try some standard phrases and see how they sound now.
“You hurt me by saying that!” Who was hurt? Was it the brain? Is the point of awareness complaining?
“I demand respect.” Who is demanding respect? Is it the neurons within your brain? Or perhaps it is the electro-chemical reactions between the neurons that want more respect?
Where is this self we refer to when we say, “I”? Can you locate this self of soap opera and love song? The “I” we have found so far is a silent, still point of awareness. You wouldn’t think we could make much of a soap opera out of that, but somehow we do.
* * * * *
“I am” Meditation 4: Where Neuroscience and Mystical Intuition Converge
Reflection:
As awareness we enter a space of bliss and compassion. But how do we get to this place? Ancient traditions suggest meditating on the area in the center of the upper forehead known as the third eye or the inner eye.
Research in neurobiology suggests the very same area may be the origin and location of our self awareness, according to neuroscientists Quartz and Sejnowski. In their book, Liars, Lovers, and Heroes, they direct our attention to a very small area in our prefrontal cortex, Area 10, as the possible location for self awareness. It is an area more developed in humans than in other primates. It contains some of our most complex brain cells. When it is damaged a patient’s memory functions and they are able to learn new facts, but when asked about personal experiences they can’t recall them. They seem to have lost their ability to maintain a sense of self.
Let's explore this area where mystics have focused their attention for thousands of years and neuroscientists now join them, Area 10 - the place where neuroscience and mystical intuition converge.
Meditation:
With the use of your imagination turn your attention to the inside of your head and to your brain itself. Let’s look for the thinker inside our head. We want to witness the one we refer to when we say “I”. Let’s look for it and see who it really is.
First become conscious of yourself behind your eyes looking out at the world around you. Visualize yourself inside your head behind your eyes. Next, turn you attention to yourself as a point of silent awareness in the middle of your head. Maintain this focus for a few moments.