4 Bitches And A Set Of Triplets
7 Patterns of Destructive Thinking Sabotaging Your Life
By Flora Hazel Tysee
Smashwords Edition © 2010 Flora Hazel Tysee
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by an information storage and retrieval system—except by a reviewer who may quote brief passages in a review to be used in a magazine, newspaper, or on the web—without permission in writing from Flora Hazel Tysee.
Editor—Joy Taylor Grant
Cover Image—Charfish Designs
Acknowledgements
Without you…There is no me…
Flora—My “Grannie”
Hazel—My “Mother”
Tysee—My “Great Grannie”
To Brenda—There are no words except…Thank You
To William—My Father
To Lela—My Sister
To John—My Brother
To Keith—My Best Friend
To Marge—My Spiritual Advisor
To all not mentioned…Thank You
Table of Contents
Let me first apologize for the title of the book. I’m sorry. I struggled deeply with the title because honestly I was afraid of offending you. The old saying “sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me didn’t work. The word Bitch can hurt if used with malicious intent and evoke great laughter if said with a humorous undertone. Some question its use and others shrug with indifference. In the end “Bitch” can polarize. Thus the reason for the use of the word Bitch in the title. Bitches and Triplets are polarizing your life. Because of your Bitches and Triplets, you are doing and saying things that are not coming from you. Your actions and words come from them. They are always fighting for their survival and will sabotage any and all things that you love and cherish. They create havoc because you have failed to control them. As they are unseen, the Bitches and Triplets are more detrimental to the soul than someone from the outside. Because they exist inside of you, most likely they are the central contributors to failed relationships; both personal and professional. They need to be eliminated. Their power comes from you caving beneath the weight of their demands. It requires a determined effort to control them. They are seriously toxic and very dangerous. They cannot roam unattended. They must be harnessed.
Who are these Bitches that exert this much power and control? They are Doubt, Fear, Ego and Bitterness. Standing equally proud are the Triplets: Self-Pity, Self-Righteousness and Self-Limitation. I know what you’re thinking: You’ve got to be kidding me! Doubt! Fear! Ego! Bitterness! Please! The only Bitches and Triplets that are creating havoc in my life are the Bitches that want my job, my sweetheart or can’t get with my program. By responding in this manner, it’s evident that you have been captured. This type of attitude and disposition is, and was, the perfect fertilizer for their toxic growth. Their growth and existence depends on you. They will not and cannot exist without your permission and participation. They are powerless against you unless you agree to partner with them. If you choose this partnership, you will need the court of supreme self to break free. They love drama. They love confusion. They love depression. They love for you to feel bad about yourself. This is their power. When you’re down, they revel in glee. When you have issues, they become your counselor. They know they have your ear and you are a captive audience. Without you they can’t exist and they will fight mightily to remain alive. They are serious.
Are you interested in how I know of these destructive demons? I’ve had serious battles with them. During a conversation with a close friend I referred to Doubt as a Bitch. I recognized anyone this intentionally vicious is a Bitch. However, the worst was yet to come.
I was diagnosed with Polymyositis, a sister to Multiple Sclerosis. This disease shreds the fibers of the muscles and debilitates the soul. After being told to alter my lifestyle and adjust to living with this disease, Doubt and Fear worked to shred my spirit. Every ache and pain echoed their chatter.
My physical and emotional survival was at stake and for the record I was scared.
I was a guest at the Ball of the Bitches and it was no fun. I couldn’t use “poop or get off the pot,” as I had difficulty getting on the pot. So, I began reading self-help and metaphysical books centered on the power of thought. After reading these books, my soul filled with wonderment and I would feel encouraged. I had a battle on my hands and I was ready for war. Yet, after closing the pages and attempting to use a muscle or two, they would arrive. Yes, the Bitches and Triplets would arrive to begin their assault. I noticed changes in my thinking upon their arrival. I noticed after attempting to use my muscles I would begin to Doubt that I would ever be whole again. Fear would paint mental pictures of my crumbling body. As I succumbed to Fear’s artistry, I would Limit myself as to what I should try. I must admit, there were days I felt a tinge of Bitterness. However, because I wasn’t bitter prior to my illness, the Bitch Bitterness couldn’t pitch her tent for too long. And yes, there were days I threw myself a major Pity party. That Bitch would arrive unannounced and I would welcome her in. We would sit for hours and I would allow her to drown me in her sorrow.
How did I come to recognize the others? I started listening and observing. When you’re ill, there's not a lot to talk about, so I listened. Bitch Ego emerged first. I recognized there were people that I had known for years and suddenly I didn’t enjoy their company. In the woes of my illness, they were too busy discussing themselves and I don’t think to this day they fully recognize how sick I was. Last, but not least, was Self-Righteousness. There is nothing more annoying than a former sinner who has become obnoxiously Christian. They wanted to assure me that although I was being punished for an “unknown sin,” God still loved me. Wow! Even children want to know the reason for punishment.
Yet, despite being aware of these treacherous fiends, the most revealing awakening was I knew I had to battle them within my own mind. The age-old adage that you can run from anything except yourself is very true. This was a mental war. I had to learn to control the Bitches with my own thoughts. Family and friends could offer encouragement from the outside; however, the battle was purely mental. To win this war I had to learn to fight with the swiftness of an eagle and the sternness of a military officer. I had to battle through my tears when I felt they were winning and my voice seemed to drown beneath their waves of negativity. I had to muster the strength when I was tired of their antics, and fight as best as I could. The Bitches were relentless and I had to be as persistent as well. When I awoke in the morning they were waiting. When I closed my eyes in the evening they were standing nearby. Sometimes I would tire just from the thought of knowing they were hovering. My battle with them was not an easy undertaking. Yet, I continued the task to regain my muscles, and more importantly, to regain my soul.
Before I began to control them, I allowed them to create pain and sorrow, regret and indecision, along with countless trials and tribulations. While I didn’t have to battle all of them, what I did battle was more than enough.
To make your battle easier, at the end of each chapter you will be given Bitch Busters and Triplet Thumpers. These are simple and forceful responses to offset the numerous and nasty comments the Bitches and Triplets will create within your thoughts. As I stated earlier, they cannot exist without your permission and participation! You’ve got to Bitch Bust and Triplet Thump with a vengeance! They want to survive so be determined in your effort. It won’t be easy, as they have been accustomed to having their way with you. However, be vigilant, be steady and remain focused. And most important…Remain strong. With that said…let’s “Bust some Bitches and Thump those Triplets.”
—Flora Hazel Tysee
Doubt is the Bitch of all Bitches. She is the Alpha Bitch. All of the others follow her. Some claim the apple that destroyed the souls of Adam and Eve was Doubt. Why was God so adamant that they never taste the apple? What did this apple represent that it was the only fruit in the garden that was forbidden? If it is true that the apple represented Doubt, I fully understand why God was so unforgiving. He knew that once eaten it would create a continuum of self-separation for centuries. In his marvelous book, The Voice of Knowledge, Don Miguel Ruiz writes, “When we bit into the apple, we ate the lies that came with that knowledge. The mind is very fertile ground for concepts, ideas and opinions. If someone tells us a lie and we believe it, that lie takes root in our mind. There it can grow big and strong, just like a tree. One little lie can be very contagious.”
And needless to say, Doubt has done just that! Once this Bitch enters your thoughts, the old adage, “An apple a day keeps the doctor away,” doesn’t fit. It should be “A bit of Doubt each day keeps everything away.” Doubt is a bold, strong-willed, sassy thing. She’s sly and full of nasty guile. Say you’re starting a project. Doubt will begin with “Are you sure?” or “Is this the right thing?” or “Have you thought about this?” or “This is a bit much for you.” Thus begins Doubt’s cunning ways as she numbs your spirit and cages your soul.
She is aware that if she plays you right, you will eventually succumb to her desires. What are her desires? It’s her desire that you remain a pitiful and pathetic rendition of your true self. She hopes you squander all opportunity for your dreams because you doubt your own power. Her desire is that you live your life as her puppet, dangling and dancing at her every command while attempting to control your life strings.
She knows you. She knows how you operate. She’s been watching you for years. It started early. She was there when you received that first comment that made you question yourself. She took note. These notes would become critical to her success against you. Can you recall when you were young and became cognizant of her existence? You didn’t know what to call it, but you felt torn. That was Doubt. After that comment, she filed that feeling away and from that point whenever you attempted to do something that would leave her behind; she would swiftly bring those feelings of being torn to the forefront of your mind. This Bitch is serious! She regenerates old feelings that you experienced eons ago and justifies their validity. These feelings are the first assault on your soul.
After summoning feelings of self-separation from the past, Doubt begins the second assault. She starts to make you feel as if you are a fake, a fraud or an imposter. After all, who are you to assume that you can achieve great things? How dare you! And if you are successful, she gnaws at your attempt in order to convince you that what you have accomplished is not real. How could you be this successful? How is it that people are listening to you? Doubt will tell you that any day people will find out they have made a mistake and you are not who you are portraying yourself to be.
Doubt told you years ago that you should never attempt anything that was worthwhile. More importantly, don’t attempt what you can’t conquer! It’s not worth it. In other words, you’re not worth it. Doubt’s attempts to distract you from your greatness are endless. She is so good. Before you know it, you are questioning the plans you have charted to unleash your greatness. You have allowed Doubt the privilege of being the chauffeur in your “life car.” However, she’s driving without your direction. You’re in a fast lane, slowly being driven into Doubt’s abyss of darkness, and the only light you’ll see is the glow of her madness.
As I stated earlier, Doubt has been aware of you far longer than you have been aware of her. Her notes began years before you ever knew that Bitches existed. Based on those notes, Doubt knows who should complement your life experience. She will always render experiences that reflect her. Because nothing turns out as it should, you falter in the belief of yourself. You believe Doubt’s assessment of you. Doubt sits patiently as she understands that you are tethered and it’s just a matter of time before you acquiesce to her desires, which means you accomplish nothing
Doubt says, “Other people succeed. It’s not meant for you.” I must confess that as I began to gather my thoughts to write this book, Doubt raised her head. Her first statement to me: “You’re not an author!” I yelled back, “Neither are you, so SHUT UP!” Sabotage begins with a very simple statement such as this, and if allowed to roam without retort, escalates until you remain in a stagnant state.
What you need to understand is that Doubt suffers from delusions of grandeur. She believes she knows more about your power than you do. She believes that your power is limited to her beliefs of you. She is Doubt. She is the Grand Diva.
Doubt is not who she claims to be. While presenting herself as your protector, she overwhelms you with feelings of uncertainty. The idea that was so solid and stellar in its inception has now been flung against the rocks of shattered dreams. What’s so amazing is that you believed her! You became paralyzed and attracted a chorus of friends, family and associates who all chirp in a melodic chorus, “You can’t do this” or “You can’t do that.”
Doubt will send the experiences that reflect her. It makes sense if you feel you have no support. You don’t support yourself! Feeling the failure, the anxiety and the sense of self slowly drifting downward, you feel whipped. “Why are you even trying?” Doubt asks. “You and I both know it’s not going to work out. Let it go!” As you slowly descend into your self-induced hell, Doubt knows you are captured. You have made her very happy. She can have her way with you because you now Doubt yourself.
So how do you deal with this Bitch? By standing up to her! You must rant! You must rave! You must reduce her to nothing! You must learn to stop her in her tracks! Do not whisper. YELL! This Bitch is too good and has been around too long to halt at the whisper of your voice. She is not that type of girl. You must SHOUT her name because she cannot be swayed with an easy tone. She has evolved with the ages and has gotten more sophisticated with time. Tell this Bitch she must go! Let her know this is your life and you no longer desire to party with her. So, stand up and shout, “Doubt, you Bitch, leave me alone!” If you have to repeat this a thousand times, then you must. If you have to put your fist to your hand and let out a primal scream, then you must. This Bitch is serious! She wants to rule your world. You cannot let this happen! You will have to fight until you’re tired and then some! But whatever you do, do not give in to this Bitch! Keep this Bitch out of your heart, head and soul. She means you harm. Serious harm. What you will be waging is a Mental Makeover, Mental Remodel and a Mental War. You must understand that this Bitch never takes a day off. If she were an employee, she would always win employee of the year for all of her hard work and dedication. Doubt is on her job every second, every minute and every hour. That’s why you must learn to combat her voice. Yes, you can do this! Is it easy? No! However, you can do this!
Below are examples of how to Bust this Bitch. As you become stronger and more convinced that you are lessening her grip, you will find your own voice, and your own Bitch Buster soldiers will emerge. When you Bitch Bust, remember you are at war. Forget being ladylike. You are in a battle. I’m certain Allah, Buddha, God or Mohammad will forgive you if you feel the need to stomp your feet, scream out loud or use unladylike language. On the mental battlefield, everything goes!
Bitch Doubt: You weren’t born with a silver spoon in your mouth!
Bitch Buster: Who wants to be born with a silver spoon? I prefer gold! SHUT UP!
Bitch Doubt: Aren’t you a little old to be considering this?
Bitch Buster: No. Put a “G” in front of old and that’s what I am. Gold! SHUT UP!
Bitch Doubt: You’ll never succeed!
Bitch Buster: Maybe not. But I’m going to enjoy myself trying. SHUT UP!
Bitch Doubt: You’re a fake and an impostor. People will eventually find out about you.
Bitch Buster: Wrong! I am very good at what I do. I have earned my way with hard work, dedication and perseverance. SHUT UP!
Bitch Doubt: Do you really believe you can pull this off?
Bitch Buster: If I don’t pull this off, there has to be a very good reason. SHUT UP!
Bitch Doubt: Don’t trust yourself. You’re no expert.
Bitch Buster: I’ll seek the opinion of experts. However, in the final analysis, I will always trust myself to do what’s right for me, and for those involved. SHUT UP!
Bitch Doubt: Who do you think you are?
Bitch Buster: I am a child of the universe. It’s up to me to use, to the best of my abilities, all that I have been blessed with. That’s who I know I am. SHUT UP!
Bitch Doubt: You’re a minority.
Bitch Buster: No. With Allah or Buddha or God or Mohammad on my side, I am a majority. SHUT UP!
Bitch Doubt: What would your Mother/Father/Significant Other/Relative think?
Bitch Buster: In the words of Rhett Butler from Gone with the Wind, “Frankly my dear, I don’t give a damn.” SHUT UP!
Bitch Doubt: You’ll make a fool of yourself.
Bitch Buster: I appreciate the concern. SHUT UP!
Norman Vincent Peale states in The Power of Positive Thinking, “Believe in yourself! Have faith in your abilities! Without a humble but reasonable confidence in your own powers you cannot be successful or happy. But with sound self confidence you can succeed.”
Fear is Doubt’s juggernaut. She is the Mighty Warrior. She is the Bitch who loves to war with you and attempts to win at any cost. If the cost is your head, your heart or your soul, Fear is relentless in her pursuit. So be prepared!
Once Doubt has you in her grip, she sends Fear to paint the canvas of events that most likely won’t happen. Fear mounts her high-stepping horse and begins the journey to lasso your soul. As with all the Bitches, you cannot actually see Fear. Nonetheless, her presence is undeniable. You know when she’s arrived. Fear wants her presence felt, so she rattles your senses and shakes your nerves. Fear’s presence is best described as the scariest scene from any movie whose intent is to make an indelible impression. She creates scenes within your head to scare the hell out of you. Fear should have won an Oscar long ago! I will re-create some of her best work.
Traveling on an airplane? You immediately see the plane crashing. It’s so vivid, so real. You shudder. You shake. Fear is laughing as you react to the scene in your head. The plane spirals downward. You clutch your armrest. You see yourself mummified in your seat like an Egyptian Pharaoh laid to rest. It’s here! This is it! The end of your life! You cancel your trip. You rearrange everything to travel by train. That’s safer. So, you rearrange your plans to travel by train, until Fear creates a picture of a massive train derailment with you onboard. Can’t you see what she does? Whatever you do to try to escape her, she creates another scenario and another and another. As I stated earlier, this Bitch is relentless. She will not stop! Fear will attempt to permeate the fabric of your soul. She is a very demanding Bitch!
Pregnant? Imagine this. You’re enjoying your day. That’s one of her secrets. Fear enjoys the assault much more when you are at peace with yourself. As you rub the curvature of your swollen belly, Fear shows you a picture of your child being born deformed. The feeling of sorrow and sadness engulf you. You panic. Fear convinces you that God will punish you for all the wrong you have done since childhood. Every piece of food that you have ever consumed has been passed along to your unborn. That glass of wine that you drank last year will cause your unborn irreversible damage. You listen to the news reports on all the germs and viruses that are sweeping the nation. If it’s airborne, you are certain your unborn will catch it. You feel validated for purchasing the hazardous waste jumpsuit, which eliminates the need for the latex gloves you were accustomed to wearing.
Once you purchase any items that are utterly ridiculous, Fear is completely satisfied. You are moving closer to being her captive as she slowly debilitates your mind, your heart and your soul. Be careful as you attempt to shrug her off, as she can become very nasty. Like her mother, Doubt, Fear needs you to be a captive audience because she is aware that she can’t exist without your permission and participation. As with all the Bitches, she is a coward and will use her Cousins to help accomplish her mission.
Who are the Cousins? They are Illogical Thinking and Irrational Feelings. Once you have agreed to participate with this Bitch, the Cousins begin to move within you. Where your good reason and sound judgment once dwelled, now the thoughts and feelings of a fool are standing firm to defend what you have allowed Fear to create.
Fear can be very powerful. I am not using the word powerful lightly. Have you gone into battle against her? This Bitch is fierce! The images that she creates can be so real.
Let’s use claustrophobia as an example. Closed areas present a challenge and you’ve been diligently working on this issue. So, to show yourself that you are ready for a challenge, you purchase tickets to the event of the year. Your excitement can hardly be contained.
You shop for the perfect clothes, shoes, accessories etc. As the event date nears, a tinge of gloom moves across the waters of your soul. It feels like a slow fog descending upon an open bay. This, my friend, is the Bitch called Fear.
Fear is always ready to war with your soul, your spirit and, of course, your mind. Her movie opens with 90,000 people jammed into an arena. You are sitting in the middle of your row. The next scene is someone yelling “fire,” and all hell breaks loose. Can you feel what Fear is creating? This Bitch has begun her righteous battle for your mind. You feel your breath shorten. Your lungs feel as if they are full of sand as your mouth becomes grainy and extremely dry. You cannot pull your thoughts together because you are being blasted on each side by Irrational Feeling and Illogical Thinking. That feeling of desperation arises. As the pressure mounts within your chest, you feel the beads of perspiration gather upon your temple. You are certain you are having a major heart attack.
This Bitch has you now. You are in full panic mode. Throngs of people surround you. You can’t escape. You want to run but you know it’s too late. Fear understands she has you now. It’s you and her. And this is where fear is most powerful. You have not attended the concert! The occurrence is ALL IN YOUR HEAD! Think about that for a moment. This Bitch has taken you for a ride that is not real! Fear created a movie, which you bought hook, line and SUNK YOU! You got snookered. By responding as you have to her bull, you became a willing participant in her drama. Fear feels glorious because she has won. You have become so afraid of nothing. Absolutely nothing!
Remember that Fear cannot exist without your permission and participation. There is no war without you. There is no struggle without you. There is no victor without you.
Why? Fear is a lonely warrior. There is nothing to fight if you are not involved. There is nothing to challenge if you ignore her. However, when you ignore her, she becomes a jilted lover and her rage attempts to bury you with the rapid assault of negativity. The panic-creating movie frames are tossed before you in succession and locked on fast forward until you decide that enough is enough. Locking you into her world gives her great pleasure.
Fear prevents you from being you. Fear prevents you from being who you are. Fear prevents you from living your life. Instead, she wants you to live her life. You need to free yourself from fear. Actually, you must free yourself from this Bitch. If not, she will remain with you throughout your lifetime. If she remains, you will act out her life, not yours.
Fear enjoys the level of insanity that she creates. But consider what happens when you verbally or mentally shout her down with statements such as, “No, I will not let you have me! No! I will not allow you to run freely within my soul! No! This is my life! Shut up and leave me alone!” What happens when you do that? Does Fear become quiet? If so, where did she go? Where is that loud bothersome noise that a few moments earlier would not cease its torture? Well, if you notice, Fear, along with being a mighty warrior, is also a coward. Oh, yes, a big fat Bully!
Remember the days of the schoolyard bully? The Bully was always the loudest, the one who, when you appeared afraid, would become more sadistic in their approach. Do you remember trying to reason with the Bully? You tried to get the Bully to understand that you wanted no trouble. All you wanted was to be left in peace. Well, with that approach, what happened? Nothing! However, when you stood up to the Bully and backed the Bully down, the essence of the Bully changed. When you stated to the Bully point blank that she might want to reconsider messing with you, the eyes of the Bully widened. The Bully was confused. Were you joking? Could this be? Were you standing up to the Bully? Your voice rose. You put your finger in the Bully’s chest. You looked the Bully squarely in the eye and said, “Find someone else. I’m not the one!” That’s what you need to do with Fear.
Yes, Fear is within your head and it is difficult to poke your hand to Fear’s chest. However, mentally it can be done. Look Fear in the eye within your mind. Poke your finger in Fear’s chest and say the following: “You don’t, you won’t, and you can’t scare me! You only exist because I allow you to exist! You can only have a voice if I give you the power to have a voice. You have this twisted. Yes, this situation concerns me, and yes I struggle with it. But, it’s my struggle, not yours. So, I suggest you leave me alone. I suggest you return to your nothingness and find another place that will allow you to exist. Your existence will not be within my soul, my heart or my head. Get over yourself. You are not more powerful than me. Remember, I allow you to exist. I allow you to live. Without me you are nothing! As a matter of fact that’s exactly what you are—nothing.
Now, after stating these facts to Fear, I’m certain you’ll hear nothing but the silence of your peaceful soul. Where did Fear go? You search your mind. Nothing. You listen for the sound of her voice. Nothing. This is what happens when you stand up to Fear.
However, you must remember she may not be gone for long. If you haven’t totally solved the issue that makes you afraid, believe me when I say to you that fear will return with a vengeance. Remember, Fear is a mighty warrior and she will not retreat easily. When cowards are embarrassed, their usual mode of operation is to find a means of getting even. Fear is a coward. She will plot, plan and pursue until only one of you survives. Again, fear is a mighty warrior.
Depending on the control you have on the issue you’re working with will depend on how forceful Fear will return. If you have worked hard on your issues and continue to do so, Fear cannot return with her mighty force. However, if you have not understood precisely who and what Fear does, you must be prepared to stand up again and do the same thing until this Bitch no longer bothers you. Test these Bitch Busters. See what works for you.
Bitch Fear: Something bad is going to happen.
Bitch Buster: When it does, let me know. SHUT UP!
Bitch Fear: Don’t travel by air. The plane will crash.
Bitch Buster: At the very least, I’m rid of you. SHUT UP!
Bitch Fear: Don’t drive the freeway. You’ll get into an accident.
Bitch Buster: I’ve got good health and car insurance. SHUT UP!
Bitch Fear: Don’t tell your boss how you feel. You’ll be fired.
Bitch Buster: I am always professional with my feedback. SHUT UP!
Bitch Fear: You shouldn’t go out alone.
Bitch Buster: I always do the necessary things to keep me safe. SHUT UP!
Bitch Fear: If you go on vacation, your home will be burglarized.
Bitch Buster: My home and valuables are safe. SHUT UP!
Bitch Fear: Don’t try that. You’ll fail.
Bitch Buster: Abraham Lincoln failed 14 times in his quest. SHUT UP!
Bitch Fear: Don’t fall in love. You’re going to get hurt.
Bitch Buster: I’m certain I’ll get over it or I’ll seek help. SHUT UP!
Bitch Fear: Don’t trust people outside of your race.
Bitch Buster: My race is wo/mankind. SHUT UP!
Bitch Fear: Don’t become rich because money will change you.
Bitch Buster: Money can’t change me, only I can change me. SHUT UP!
All Fear is not bad. If you control her, she is a companion throughout your life that can lead you away from potential harm. But left uncontrolled, she will dominate you like no one else ever has and ever will. She’s a bad Bitch! You will have to remind her time and again that you are the boss. Her memory can be short lived. You must set the ground rules for her. Let her know that she is there to help you, not hinder you. Tony Robbins, the preeminent master motivator, states, “Let fear be a counselor and not a jailer.” I totally agree with Mr. Robbins. Let Fear know you depend on her to stay safe, but you will not be her prisoner.
“Avoid having your ego so close to your position that when your position falls, your ego goes with it.”—Colin Powell.
“The Ego represents what may be called reason and common sense. It is said to operate on a reality principle, meaning it allows you to express your desires, drives and morals in realistic and socially appropriate ways.”
—Psychology Eighth Edition in Modules. David G. Myers. 2007 Worth Publishers. Module 44.
While the explanation of Ego is very simple and easy to understand, the key words are “reality” and “socially appropriate.” What is your reality and what do you deem socially appropriate? It can be argued that realistic is subjective. What is considered realistic to one is not for the other. However, I believe that most of us are somewhat aware of what is socially appropriate. If this is the case, how is it that some of you are not operating in the realm of reality and your behavior is not socially appropriate? The answer is quite simple. The Bitch called Ego has given you permission to speak and act inappropriately! And your reality has become twisted!
At this moment in time YOU ARE ALL THAT! You are successful or maybe not. You are healthy or maybe not. You are happy or maybe not. However, within your mind you have no rivals. It always has been and always will be all about you!
Yet, because of your reality and socially inappropriate actions, you don’t realize this Bitch is not winning you friends nor are you influencing anyone. Secretly, you are disliked. Surprised? You shouldn’t be. Behind your back people are saying that your ego is out of control! Yep, although you believe you are well liked and admired, most folks don’t enjoy being around you. Why? You are socially inappropriate! Your most common offenses are the following: